Imagine all the struggles we had 20 or 30 years ago when navigating middle, junior, and high school.
Bullying happened. Bullying was difficult.
And yet, at 3 pm we could go home where it was safe and get a break from the exposure. We played outside, and our parents had little to worry about in regard to our welfare.
But today…
Today’s adolescents have a much harder time. They have technology which allows for no escape from their peers and the stressors of life. They have a constant social connection through social media and online gaming.
Behaviors of withdrawing from the family, starting to cling to peers, and being constantly on their phones are typical reactions to unspoken problems. One or all of these could be the adolescent’s way of coping with deeper struggles either from home or in school.
How I help
I offer an approach where I meet the adolescents where they are. We start off slow trying different ways to connect. I ask about their interests and encourage them to share those things with me. I answer their questions and demonstrate how I understand as I was once a struggling young person, too.
Trust is the most important part of the therapeutic relationship. If your young person connects with me and is willing to open up, I can help them work through and identify the areas in which they want to make changes.
Working with teens includes a team approach. It will be necessary for the family to participate in family sessions and complete assignments to ensure that change happens all around.
I have learned the following:
Our teens just did not wake up one day and start behaving badly. There is most likely some disconnect in the home which has been missed and is in need of repair. We would only approach family therapy if the entire family is on board to be vulnerable to change.
Some reasons you may decide to contact me are:
- Changes in family life, like moving, divorce, a death, or serious illness in the family
- The loss of a close friend, girlfriend, or boyfriend through death or a breakup of a relationship
- Moving
- Developing an illness or disability
- Any kind of substance abuse or addiction
- Bullying or abuse
- Teen pregnancy
- Tragic events in the community or the world
When an adolescent needs therapy…
The list below identifies behaviors you may be experiencing which are symptomatic of a problem:
- Suicidal thoughts and behaviors. These may include talking, joking, drawing, or writing about suicide or death, giving away cherished possessions, or expressing feelings that they are worthless or that things would be better without them. If you or someone you know is feeling suicidal, call 911 or a suicide hotline or get medical help immediately.
- Symptoms of depression, like being withdrawn, lack of appetite, sleeping very little or more than nine hours per night, loss of interest in things they once enjoyed, neglecting personal hygiene, crying for no reason, or seeming sad for longer than two weeks.
- Violent behavior, harming or threatening to harm themselves or others, including animals
- Suddenly gaining or losing a lot of weight, which could indicate a life-threatening eating disorder
- Extreme, rapid changes in moods or personality, or drastic changes that last more than six weeks
- Running away from home
- Illegal activities
- Behavior problems at school
- Using tobacco, drugs, or alcohol
- A sudden change in friends
- Risky sexual behavior or sexual promiscuity
- Other risky or dangerous behavior
- Noticeable changes in school performance or attendance
